


Cathartic Water

by SherbetLemon



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Homesick Lance (Voltron), Homesickness, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, One Shot, Pidge and Hunk are barely there, Sharing a Bed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-04
Updated: 2018-02-04
Packaged: 2019-03-13 18:04:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,701
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13576038
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SherbetLemon/pseuds/SherbetLemon
Summary: Lance gets homesick and begins hiding, worrying about its effect on his friendships. Keith goes to check up on him and ends up comforting him.





	Cathartic Water

‘Where’s Lance?’

Keith considered the question, let it fill his mind like a hot air balloon. Where was Lance? He hadn’t seen him much over the past week and now he thought about it, that was strange. Lance loved hanging around everyone, even if it was just to talk without saying anything. It was exhausting just to think about, but it’s what Lance did, what made him happy. So why wasn’t he doing that now?

‘He’s probably just holed up in his room playing Killbot Phantasm’ Pidge replied from behind her laptop screen, barely sparing Hunk a glance.

Hunk nodded, muttering ‘makes sense,’ before disappearing from the room under Keith’s watchful eye.

Ten minutes later, Hunk returned, eyebrows knotted as he landed next to Keith on the sofa. His aura wafted over Pidge who peered around the side of her laptop. ‘Something up Hunk?’

‘No,’ Hunk replied quickly, ending on a high, questioning pitch. He sighed before speaking honestly, ‘It’s just, Lance was really short with me. Like, he wasn’t mean or anything, he just seemed… moody? I guess.’

‘Odd.’

‘Yeah, really odd. It was the same on Monday too. When we were eating breakfast, he barely made conversation and was just, kinda, quiet?’

‘Maybe he’s getting ill?’ Pidge thought aloud, ‘That would explain why he hasn’t left his room.’

‘I guess.’ Hunk shrugged, unconvinced. He continued to frown, deep in an ocean of thought.

The conversation had perplexed Keith. Lance wasn’t being himself, hadn’t been for a while. He felt anxious, little bubbles of worry popping in his blood. Lance never acted up, was there something going on?

 

Keith found himself standing outside Lance’s door, feeling like a lemon. His knuckles remained inches from the door like they were two North poles unable to touch. He took a deep breath. It was just Lance. He was just checking in on him, like anyone else would do if their friend was ill. Nothing to be nervous about, right? He pulled his hand back. No. Lance would definitely find this weird. When had Keith ever checked in on him before? He should’ve got Hunk to come instead, that would’ve been normal. He sighed, turning to leave.

‘Is someone there?’

Keith froze. Lance’s voice was soft, muffled by the metal door but somehow vulnerable.

‘Uhh, yeah.’ Keith replied eloquently.

A beat of silence passed. ‘You want something?’

‘N-no. I just…’ He tailed off, unable to finish the sentence. Coward.

The door slid open, Lance hiding in the darkness, searching for Keith from the safety of his room. The low light didn’t reveal much but his eyes seemed blood shot and the skin surrounding them ashen. ‘You okay?’

Keith was taken aback. Lance asked the question dancing on his lips, reversing its effect. It would almost be funny if it wasn’t for Keith’s concern. ‘That’s what I came here to ask you.’

‘Oh.’ Lance paused before forcing out a laugh. ‘Well no need. I’m fine so see ya.’ The door was sliding shut before he’d even finished speaking, Lance slinking back into the darkness.

Keith’s foot moved before his brain had even given the instructions, blocking the door before Lance could seal himself away like a demon.

‘Lance. What’s going on?’ Keith spoke to the door, a slither pried open by his foot.

The spirit remained in hiding.

‘What? Nothing’s going on. Why’d you say that?’

‘Open the door Lance.’ Keith commanded, foot unmoving like a rock protruding from a waterfall.

After a moment of deliberation, Lance sighed, pressing the door release. When he did, Keith’s eyes fell on a sniffling mess, blanket around his shoulder’s like a cape and room like a cave. He stepped over the boundary, pressing the door shut behind him and raising the silver lights, one’s that simulated moonlight through bars along the circuit boards, avoiding killing the vampire with harsh daylight.

‘Pidge said you might be sick, I wanted to check up on you.’

Lance sighed heavily before flopping back onto his bed, staring up at the ceiling. ‘Not physically.’

Keith paused, confused at what Lance meant. He carefully approached the bed, perching awkwardly beside the other, unsure what to say. Luckily, Lance broke the silence.

‘Do you ever miss home?’

Keith swallowed. Truthfully, he hadn’t given home much thought. His mind was so busy with all the new developments in his life, it hadn’t even crossed his mind to miss it. ‘I guess not.’

Lance sighed, rolling his head to look at Keith, ‘I do. A lot actually.’

Keith stayed quiet before making a decision. Falling back, he joined Lance, lying by his side and staring at the ceiling. The lights cast strange shadows across the ceiling, hashing grey patterns that formed mountains, forests, and diamonds.

‘It comes in waves.’ Lance began softly. ‘Like one day I’m fine, I’m helping Coran work on the ship, or watching Hunk attempting to bake, and it’s fun. I’m cracking jokes, forming bonds, having a good time. But the next, I just can’t enjoy it.’

The sad lilt in his voice didn't go unnoticed. Or the way his shoulders seemed to sink further into the mattress as he spoke. ‘It’s like my minds too full. I can’t talk properly, can’t laugh, can’t join in, even though I know I need to. Because all I want to do is go home.’

His fingers began to fiddle with the sheets, a wistful longing climbing across his words.

‘I want to feel the sun on my skin, fresh air in my lungs. Talk to my mum, see what she’s up to, know she’s okay. Check in with my sisters, annoy them by lounging around in their rooms just ‘cause I can.’

He chuckled, reminiscing about his home life, it made Keith smile to think about Lance’s close family, how much he cared for them.

‘Go for a drive into town with my brother, sing along to the radio at the top of our lungs because we’re driving, and we’ll be long gone by the time anyone notices. Walk to the beach and just sit on the cliff’s alone. Not doing anything special. Just being. Existing in a place I know by heart.’

He paused, deflating again. He seemed to be fighting with himself, holding back from spilling his secrets. Keith reached out a tentative finger, wrapping his pinky around Lance’s. The other’s tightened around it, seeming to fill him with courage.

‘Everything here is so unfamiliar. And, I know, space is beautiful and I’m experiencing something amazing. But, somehow, I just can’t enjoy it.’

Lance let his head fall to look at Keith’s, finally meeting his gaze once again. His eyes were rock pools, his thoughts the incoming tide threatening to flood them.

‘All I’m capable of doing is sitting in a mood I can’t escape from. I want to hide away but at the same time, all I want to do is have fun and enjoy my time out here. I’m stuck in this wormhole where I can’t get to either side and become happy. Like I’m wondering the gap between realities and don’t have the strength to pick one.’

A tear finally spilled over from his eye, glazing his cheek before soaking into the blanket below. In a small voice he let his last wish float in the air between them, ‘I just want to be happy.’   

Keith pulled him into a hug, unable to hear that voice, those words. See the sad eyes and feel the desperate need without doing something. Lance broke down on his shoulder, eye’s fountains of emotions, sobs crying out for help. He held him strongly in his arms, the only thing he could offer him being his presence.

‘I just…’ He forced out between sharp breaths and sudden sniffs. ‘I know I’m no good like this. I want to be around everyone, join in with life, but I can’t. They’re going to get fed up with me, resent me whilst this mood sits over my shoulders like a demon feeding off my dark emotions. I don’t want to lose everyone, but I feel like I already have.’

Keith pulled a hand up Lance’s back, drawing large circles. ‘Lance. You haven’t lost anyone. We’re always going to be here.’

Lance shook his head, fresh tears bubbling but Keith hushed him burying his face in the warmth of the other’s neck, ‘You’re gonna have down times. You’re going to have those days where you’re not yourself but that doesn’t mean you’re never going to be.’

Lance stopped fighting his words, erratic breaths slowing as he listened.

‘Maybe we can’t always know what you’re going through, maybe we won’t understand and maybe we’ll fight about it. But in the end, we’re all people. We all have worries, fears, and anxieties that overtake our minds. And that means we can all relate.’

Keith pulled away, searching for his eyes, coaxing him out of his shell. ‘So, yeah, you’ve been down. But I’m not going to leave you because of that. I’ll wait for you to figure it, do what I can to help and in the end, you’ll get through it.’

Lance smiled, falling back into the other’s shoulder, sobs finally done. The tears kept falling, only now they were warmer. Cathartic water washing away his fears, lulling the whirlpool into a steady stream. ‘Thank you.’

Keith brushed his lips against the soft skin of his neck, whispering, ‘No problem.’

He continued to rub Lance’s back until the other was completely relaxed, the two remaining peaceful in each other’s arms until they drifted off, a tangle of limbs lying the wrong way across a bed.

Lance awoke to salty cheeks, a wrinkled shirt, and a warm embrace. His skin felt raw, eyes stinging but his heart was full. Keith lay with one arm underneath him and the other strewn over his waist, hair mussed, and shirt rumpled. But he was there. And that’s all Lance needed to know. Even if he was homesick, he still had people here. Maybe he had lost sight of them for a while but that didn’t mean they had disappeared completely.  They were shadows in the night, released at sunrise. He knew he’d be okay.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm feeling a little homesick at the moment so I thought I'd write this and hopefully feel better.  
> To anyone else feeling homesick: we'll get through this, I promise x


End file.
